"Everything is permissible"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible"—but not everything is constructive. -- Paul

When I was growing up my dad instilled in me a great sense of hope. Until a few years ago, an untested sense of hope. As I grew up I was not a very athletic kid, but, I loved activity. When I got into 8th grade I started running cross country at a new school just to do something I was terrible. Over the years I got better, even got a small scholarship to go to school in Tennessee. Throughout college I was obsessed with the sport and focused on it to the utter demise of my academic potential. I did manage to graduate, but, obsessed as a I was, merely saw graduation as the opportunity to train unhindered by school. This went on for a few years. In 2002, I was running 110 miles a week hoping I would make some Michael Jordan-like breakthrough, becoming something I had longed to be for years.

It never happened. I realized, in this pursuit, it was something that would take away from a more important decision in my life: marriage. I saw a choice, love my dreams or love my wife. There was only one choice: I chose to love my wife. Pursuing my dream would have been selfish and cost me the greatest person I have ever met. I got married that summer and came to realize, or rather, accept, that I was not as gifted as I hoped. Around that time my dad, in one of our conversations, said, "It's okay to pursue your dreams until you realize they are only dreams." For me, this was a major challenge. I had truly believed that anything was possible. In this case, if I ran enough, if I did the right things, if I was perfect in my execution, if I exerted enough will, I could become what I dreamed of being. I had completely believed, "anything is possible". Running was the grounds upon which I tested this belief and came up realizing it was not true. Or, at least, not the way I thought.

A few weeks ago while driving to work, I realized as I reflected on one of our pastor's sermons that is not quite true. Indeed, all things are permissible. It is in the Bible. However, just because, as Paul said, something is permissible, does not necessarily mean it is for the best. The sermon discussed a woman who had lost her sight. To get into the church, she had to have someone assist her.

He had taken this actual experience to illustrate a larger point. Paul wrote of the church as a body. When a person is acting in a role that is not what they are intended to perform, other members of the body have to compensate for this person not doing what they are intended to do. He remarked that it's amazing how one person being unable (or, I would add to extend this notion, unwilling) to do what they are supposed to requires two bodies. This type of scenario detracts from God's ability to demonstrate his love and power because people are using their gifts the wrong way and detracting from God's glory for their own pursuits.

With my running, I believe, and, after reflection, still see that I probably could achieve my goals of being a world class athlete. However, the amount of time, energy and effort required to accomplish this would be a horrible waste of time and a gross misplacement of focus. I would have to have inordinate resources, financial, social, mental and emotional, to pursue this. That's not something, as I now sense Paul was hinting at, I see making a lot of sense.

With God, all things indeed are permissible. But, I am now inclined to ask, "Is this beneficial?" "Does this help me love more?" "Does this choice promote me or others?" It is the age old question of putting yourself or others first. We were given free will. Using it for good, however, comes at a cost. I learned that making dreams come true makes for poor goodness.