Angels, angels everywhere?

I think one of the reasons I like to think of the self as that over-arching sense of the patterns which form our sense of continuous existence points me to the luxuary factor. It's so easy to just let things be the way they are. Change, however, is not quite so easy. It often forces us to question things we faced, answered and put to bed. Of course, some of these life questions come more often than others. Now, what in the world does this have to do with my post? Only a little, but, I see the patterns of what we expect to be as forming a lot of our mindless behaviour. If we choose to actively ignore, that is to say, not question, our ways, we can mosey along quite contentedly without reason for looking back. Then, as Murphy's law would have it, things sometimes force us to turn around.

So, the point of all this: angels. While in the ER recently, I saw Perry Stone. Mannafest? Anyone ever hear of it? Kerri and I used to watch it all the time in Baton Rouge. Now that we are all metropolitan-that's economically challenged, if your pronounce it phonetically-and live in Dallas, we don't have high falutin thing like cable, so, that's out. Anyhow, something about the show made me think of angels. I literally walk around all day, particularly when I am somewhere outside my normal course of events and pattern of affairs, wondering, is the next person I meet going to be an angel? Perry Stone was talking about fallen angels (no my topic), and, in the teaching he said that angels can take the form of men. Now, many Christians might instantly scoff at this. Some might say, oh yeah, I think I remember something like that. Others are already on the same page. Yeah, I wonder, how many other people really walk around with this kind of mentality, really wondering, is the person I'm talking to a person or the Lord or a demon? Perhaps it sounds crazy, but, biblically speaking, this is a sound way to look at life. Does anyone else wonder about the folks their speaking with, or am I all alone here?

Spiritual amoeba

Last Sunday our pastor preached his last sermon of a series from the psalms. For some reason, I got sidetracked and started getting into Jeremiah 14:23. Well, there is no Jeremiah 14:23. So, I read Jeremiah 14:2-3. It didn't really strike me as anything particular. I know for myself, I have found that a particular verse, when given to me with a little nudge, typically means I should keep reading. In this case I did. I felt that so much of what was said in this spoke to our country right now. I also wondered if it spoke to where we are at or where we are going as a nation.

This reminded me of a vision I had several years ago. While praying with a prayer group, I saw an image of an amoeba approaching the United States and then slowly absorbing it. I didn't see much more than this, but, that was enough. At first, I didn't know what to think of it or how to pray about it. I asked Barbie about it at the next Streams class I got a chance to go to (the 202) and she said to pray the opposite, to pray blessing. Fast forward several years and I see a country in the tubes. I just wonder how we are going to get freed of this oppressive, life-sucking spirit. Blessing, repentence, national leadership, coverage, prayer, prayer, prayer.

Dreams and visions

During my Streams classes I recall hearing about the difference between dreams and visions. For some reason, it came to mind again today. The one thing that came to mind, and I don't think this is textbook Streams, just a thought of my own: visions frequently show events in the past, present or future that the recipient would have had no way to actually experience themselves. The difference here is that the events, in this case, are real events. Understanding visions requires little interpretation. (Of course, that's not to say it doesn't ever require interpretation. That would be totally unbiblical.) Dreams, however, as Joel infers, are something for people advanced in spiritual maturity levels. At least that's my reading of the phrase "old men". Anyhow, I was thinking about it because I get more dreams than visions. No, this isn't to say that I have either of them often, but, dreams seem to come more than visions. I just wonder what this means? I know people who are seers more than dreamers. Just an intriguing question I got while using a razor blade to saw into my sheetrock this afternoon.

While driving home tonight I heard a radio spot talking about the typical role of evangelism in Christianity. The illustrator went on to talk over the sounds of a seventh grade symphony playing Beethoven. The comparison was pretty obvious as to where it was going, but, it made sense. People often misjudge Christ based on the fact that they see his followers and think, "If this is how people who follow Christ act, why would I do it?" The spot went on to say that it would be impossible to know Beethoven was a genius based on the performance of an unskilled, imperfect actor. Likewise, watching Christians would make it impossible for anyone to truly appreciate Christ's gloriousness. Christ calls people to know him, not his followers. It was a good analogy. I think the commercial was over the top, but, I really like the point and will hopefully get to use it sometime...at least some time other than here.

I've heard the argument that people put up, "God gave me a brain, it'd be a sin not to use it." This is a rationalization for soulish behavior that justifies the belief that intellect (one third of the soul) has greater power than the spirit. This argument drives me nuts. People act in such pride and harsh ways with this belief is scares me. The same argument gives people the mentality that they can base their acceptance of God on whether they get God or not. The way this appears is that people refuse to accept certain tenets of faith based on whether it is understandable to them or not. God isn't a respecter of man. Why should he be a respecter of man's logic? Our minds are gifts from God, parts of our being which are to be used to glorify him. Using our minds to do things which defy God's laws and spirit is contrary to God's intent. This kind of ties in with my older post on the nature of love and giftedness. I really am seeing, though I think it's certainly not the main way Paul intended for this relationship to be considered, that our concepts of how gifts are meant to be used by the body of Christ differs greatly with what worldly, selfish purposes will have us do.

God and sense

During some of the Streams classes a while back I remember them talking about how to restrain your spirit. Often times proptetic people will have three types of temptations, the three G's: 1) guys/girls 2) gold and 3) glory. Folks with the guys/girls temptation will be guilty of reading people's mail and gaining unpermitted knowledge or pleasure from using their spirit on others. As I thought about this I considered that, in this culture, in this worldly culture, touching is taboo, but, looking is okay. To me, as a follower of Christ, I don't necessarily see why this works, based on the Bible.

I recall a dialog Al Pacino and Keanu Reeves had in the Devil's Advocate that went like this, "Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow." Now, in context, this was a pretty dangerous dialog, but, I think it so perfectly embodied what I am trying to point out I had to use it. If you accept one of these things, then, the next is so easy to justify, so, slippery a slope it is. And, that's the whole danger, one thing so easily leads to another.

In our over-sexed culture, people, both young and old, are constantly exposed to the visual bombardment of flesh and lust. There is a constant paradox. We are told to neither look nor touch, but, we are constantly in an environment where our eyes are given basically no choice but to see. So, here we have one sense, sight, that is forced to be exposed to horrible things and another, touch, that is supposed to be held sacred. It's such a paradox. Why is it okay for one sense to be immersed in lustful forces, and, another which is not?

Biblically, it's not. Culturally, they are permissive, so, who cares?...as the logic would go. Job made a covenant with his eyes to stare on no young women. Christ said even thinking lustfully is sinful. With these kind of examples, I have to contend with our culture: it's not okay to make such an arbitrary distinction. No one sense is any more "permitted" to be emersed in lustful forces than any other. Heck, our world suggests empiricism, as the most basic form of logic by which to test things, relies solely on the senses. If we rest solely on the senses, all we know of the world comes through what see, feel, taste, etc. So, again, using such a simplistic view of the world, why allow one sense to be okay with sin, but, not others?

The whole thrust of this post was to point out that sight is really no different from touch when it comes to immorality and abusing spiritual gifts. Whether we "touch" or "look" lustfully on another, it's still lust. The effects are still the same on the spirit. Our age needs to know that our spirit is not restricted to these "boundaries" the world deems as being okay. Likewise, how our spirit behaves must operate by God's rules, not the world's since we don't have a clue what we're doing when it comes to try to substitute our concepts of right and wrong for God's.

Caffeine is evil. Okay, that's a little harsh. Having grown up the son of two people who own a vending company, I can hardly pretend to be not be the child of caffeine peddlers. My shady history having been revealed I must admit I recently was shocked, perhaps more at my lack of awareness than anything else, that caffeine, technically speaking, is a drug. Now, drugs, to me at least, carry with them the association or marijuana, LSD, pills, booze, etc. The hard stuff. Then, when I think of caffeine, Coca Cola, Dr. Pepper, tea, puppy dogs and babies...it's hardly something to lump in with the hard stuff. I guess that association is part of what worries me the most. I, being a very stereotypical person will reach for the first can of soft drink to tickle my taste buds and wake me up all at the same time. Nonetheless, it became clear, doing this is a socially acceptable form of drug usage. It may be recreational drug usage, solely geared towards a jolt to my brain and lagging consciousness, but, it's drug usage nonetheless.

So, off I went trying to rethink how I live. Coke and drug usage. Okay, the double meaning there doesn't help. Dr. Pepper and drug usage. The two just don't seem to really mix. That reluctance to consider caffeinated soft drinks--and more dangerously, coffee, tea, pills, etc--as a negative worries me. Nothing has ever suggested soft drinks are bad except the sugary side effects. Chronic overstimulation of the CNS has a whole host of problems. I know wikipedia is just bad academic form...which makes me glad to not be an academic. Get past the basic history and pharmacology on the caffeine entry and read near the bottom. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caffeine I honestly don't see much redeeming value to the stuff.

And I confess my continued use of it. I guess that points to a larger, scarier issue. People today would rather ingest more of something that has harmful and deleterious effects, rather than live an alternative life style. Think, seriously for a moment. How many people do you know who don't use caffeine in some form or fashion? Think again, if the dangers of caffeine, though largely ignored in today's culture, were made known to someone, would they likely stop? Most people I know would rather keep on doing what they're doing. That's the rub. I, thinking myself, in theory at least, savvy enough to change my life when I come to grips with something harmful, I see the poison of caffeine and still use it. The propaganda of this drug is powerful and it's placement everywhere almost impossible to refuse, even if you try.

Kill you coffee pots people. Break the addiction. (Realize this is a little tongue and cheek if it's lost on you to this point, but, only about 5%.)

I started a new blog to allow me to keep track of my computer related ramblings. The don't really seem to fit here any longer. It can be located at: http://learningpcs.blogspot.com Take a look if you're interested.

While posting on an interesting topic I had confessed my own 2-year old temper in matters of spirituality. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I'm immature and will grow up in time. In the middle of my musings, I did, however, come to realize a little connection. For a long time, the idea of being and action had the wrong framework for me. In philosophy there is a long tradition of author's taking another thinker's work and tweaking it to make some ignored or, if not completely abused, at least, under-stated point. Sartre's "Being and nothingness" is probably the most famous, but, there are at least two other spin-offs I can think of immediately. Whitehead's "Process and being", Heidigger's "Being and Time" This whole school of philosophy deals with ontology. That's the ten-dollar word for the "study of being".

Enough of that rabbit trail. From the philosopher's war of being I gathered the basic idea that being is a passive act. Of course, if I reread these works, I would most likely realize I am projecting a personal perspective onto their works. It's been a while since I read any of these works, but, the lingering effect is that of passivity. When I came to start reading the Bible deeply, I saw verses like, "Be still and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10) that probably reinforced a somewhat questionable idea of God's desire or intention for passivity. In the context of this verse, yes, passivity was at least until I saw what I saw tonight, a misrepresentation of what I believe God truly wants.

Now, my caveat here, ok, my outright disclaimer, is that I am not pretending like I do have the answer yet. Just the realization that I need to look in a different direction. So, that direction is... If we are to be passive, as my initial thought would have lent me to reason out, we would be incapable, by definition, of doing anything. Now, I know God can, and, does, more than we can ever comprehend. But, He doesn't and, by design, isn't supposed to do it all. Ergo, it can't be complete passivity.

Hmmm, what then? So, I can do it all; i.e., I'm not God. The converse is also true; I can't do nothing. Well, that makes it tricky doesn't it. I can't pout and grow at the same time. What does that leave for me to do? Act and be. Now that kind of tweaks my brain. It used to be an either/or scenario. I could act or be, not possibly both. As I showed above, that's illogical. Reconciling how to act and be is a totally new framework for thinking about life. "Being in God", with all its embedded, personal meanings and private significance, implied, in the past, total passivity. Acting carried with it the negative meaning of "selfish" activity. I have heard that we are to surrender to God so He can be in complete control of our lives.

Sounds great. The reality, however, differs from the rosy colored dream my hope had tied itself to. Perhaps, fantasy is a better word. Nonetheless, I am coming to see that God's prompting me, nudging me to rearrange my ideas a bit. Or a lot, as the case may be. He wants something infinitely more challenging than the "surrender" of passivity. God wants me, I believe God wants all of us, to surrender, not to give up and do nothing. To act but to act as He would have us act. In a sense, He wants us to do as He wants us to do. Imagine giving up yourself so completely that you do nothing, that is to say, you make no decisions, but, rather, carry out the decisions of another.

You see, it isn't inactivity of body he wants, it's inactivity of soul. He wants us to submit our will, not our lives. He needs our lives if we are to embody His will. We all are made to glorify God with our unique calling. And, only by living as we were created to live and be, can we fully allow God to carry out His plan. As I write this I am hearing in the back of my mind the nagging voice of the cynic, the critic and the theologically minded pointing out that we do not add to God. God is omnipotent, omniscient, etc. Yeah, He's all-everything. I see it another way. If we fully submit ourselves, we add nothing to God. Instead, we detract nothing from His plan if we do as much as we can. Yet, if we do not submit ourselves, we can prevent God's plan from being as full as it could be by preventing our portion of the plan from being carried out.

Coming back from that little rabbit trail, I sense that the war of free will is the heart of the matter here. If God could replace my will with His, what would my life be like? I believe that is what God longs for us to do. Now, I can hear others ask, why would someone do that? I completely believe God's plan is the perfect plan, the following of which brings the greatest possible fulfillment in one's life. Like the detraction comment above, our life is full to the degree to which we follow God's plan. Obviously, my spiritual pouting is slowing me down. God, of course, can use all things for good. That doesn't make my tantrum okay. Just a beautiful facet of grace I thank Him for about 50 times a day.

So, that leaves me with this blank slate called my life. I stand in this moment with a past, from which to draw experiences and a future, onto which I can choose to either continue to project myself...or, I can begin to let God show me what He wants me to see. To do this, I have to let God choose for me. I cannot not choose for myself. So, to make different choices, I have to rely on someone other than myself. (I guess I am invoking the idea of otherness here.) It really is, at its core, a paradox, an impossibility. It reveals an area where God must act. I, by the nature of the situation, cannot do it for myself. So, I turn here to another person. Of course, that person, can be human (as many people turn to) or non-human, angelic, demonic, etc. That being said, being and acting is a supernatural challenge. Being oneself, and an expression of another's will at the same time, is an eternal complexity I am only beginning to comprehend God wants me to fully embrace.

He works in obvious, mysterious ways

One thing I love about God is how much he talks to us. No, not the "burning bush" kind of talking, or, the angels coming in the middle of the night. The quiet whispers reach me more often than the special effects kind of visit that most people think of when considering God's interaction in their lives.

In the past month our church has been giving an awesome series of sermons on happiness. To be precise, the pursuit of happiness. I've blogged on this before, but, there have been some redefinitions and quite a few ahas as a result of the series. I want to devote an entire post to that all on its own. The main thing here is that unhappiness has been a companion of mine for some time. Not one I welcome, but, rather, seem to be burdened with on a rather permanent basis.

At the core of my unhappiness is I have come to sense that the path God has me on is not the want I want to be on. Indeed, a few months ago I had to accept the realization that I am an envious Christian. Not good. Amy and I used to go to the same church and we pursued a path down the road of prophetic ministry. Only, she actually got to go down that road while I was stopped and sent a different direction. I hold it not against her in any way. Frustration has been marking my every turn. I want, so badly, to be involved in the kind of things she does. However, I find, instead of grounding myself in a church where revelatory gift is the norm, it is the exception. Instead of getting more involved in what I sense my calling is, I grow bitter about struggling to survive my daily life. Instead of...well, you get the idea. Happiness has not been on my tongue. It has been on my heart however. I long for the joy that comes from not only accepting my position in life, but, praising God, from the depths of my being, for the blessing he has poured out upon me and my family.

So, here I stand. Looking around, wondering where to go. What to do. I am in a job that is good, but, I long for more. I am trying to find ways to help the company grow and become more of what I think I am supposed to be at the same time. Yet, even in this scenario God has hidden surprises for me on an almost daily basis. I work with a couple of guys who are all very sharp at what the do. While sitting at lunch with them I realized, I am very much in what I have been prepared to do! My grandfather was basically a network engineer at Bell South for 35 years. He was a technical wizard in all respects. Since I was a kid I never wanted to go down that road because technology reminded me of business and I hated business. I always wanted to be an artist, a musician, an athlete. Anything but a technologist or a business person. (And, guess what, I work in a technology business.)

At any rate, it became clear that, in spite of my unwillingness to receive the tremendous heritage my grandfather and my father have accumulated in the type of field I am in, I was among people that they would probably have been around. In a way, even though I tried not to end up becoming like them, I am. I am surrounded by people who are gifted with technology. It was a little light bulb to know that I was in a place where I would naturally fit even though I didn't plan or want it. God had led me where I probably should have been all along.

This little realization is one of those moments that stokes the very small flame of hope in my heart. I have come to realize that hope, the kind of hope that I saw and desired in almost every one else at the prophetic arena, typically has to be hyped up. People live in this frenzied "spiritual" state. It's a sort of hyper-real sense of God that is real, but, is extremely hard to cultivate in "normal" life. In a sense, that's why people who truly pursue that type of ministry become unlike the rest of us. At any rate, hearing God say, quietly in the midst of my grumbling, "You're where you're supposed to be and where you're supposed to have been all along" is humbling.

So, I have this one little theme going on in my spirit. A lightly rousing melody of hope. That was lunch. This morning, I have another little nudge. Many years ago I went to school in Memphis and they had a series of organizations that focused on social justice. Real activist types. While there I had an acquaintance who was odd. Gifted in many strange ways. At 18 a local musician. A writer. Counter cultural. He ended up getting a degree in math (my longed for degree). He had the acclaim of professors in spite of his not seeking it. I looked at him, 10 years later, and had a sense of envy.

That was it, envy. I still struggle with desire for things I don't have. Envy. I see this guy and see so much of what I wanted. Or think I wanted. Here I am, struggling to get by, struggling to find identity, struggling to keep my head above water. And I see this guy's picture, covered in tattoos, still walking down his road, calling his own shots, success in his wake. I, nobody, no where. Then, I see amidst my own blinding cloud of temporarily self-absorbed distraction, a wonderful life, my life. The fundamental problem is simple: how to want what I have, not what I don't have. Isn't that always it? We want something we don't have because we think it will bring us happiness. We think the grass on the other side of the fence is what will make us complete, what will make us happy.

But, the green grass theory only goes so far. It doesn't really propose an end. It just proposes another step in the process. Many people argue with Christians when they assert there is a beginning point, the unmoved mover. They don't want to have to accept this type of proposition because it forces them to ask, "Well, what is that?" This naturally leads to the issue of God. If you get people looking at now, at the future, it's a lot easier to get them to lose focus. People stuck in the middle of the fire cope with life. They don't embrace it. They don't grasp the moments they are being given. Instead they try to put themselves somewhere else, somewhere better than where they are then.

By pursing things, futures, better, green grasses, people never set a goal in mind. They find a means to happiness, the temporary fix, as being an end in and of itself, when God should be the end. Even in the moment, God should be the end, the absolute reference point by which we gauge our moors as well as our mores. Happiness, as Jesus shows us in the Beatitudes, doesn't come from getting high on the next best thing. I am beginning to suspect there is so much more to the blessedness we derive from being obedient it's scary. I see the inevitable and I just keep thinking, quietly, unspoken, even to my mind, how long can I put off the inevitable?

God waits for us to truly give Him the okay before we can be ready for Him to come to us. By chasing happiness, we all too often, like children trying to catch butterflies, are never where God can meet us. We have hopped up, run away and not given Him enough time to meet us where we were supposed to be when He asked us to wait. I've heard so many times that we are often the reason we don't progress in God more than we do. I know when I make decisions, almost every little decision to ignore, despise, reject, begrudge God. And, I can't even imagine how He still loves me in my rebellious state.

I pray God can give me the happiness he has in store, provided I am willing to let Him give it to me. I pray I let Him give it to me. I guess part of the mystery is how He can speak to us and yet we choose not to hear him, to turn a deaf ear. There is typically no mystery in God if we allow Him to speak; if we are honest with what He tells us and don't cover it up in smoke, mirrors and lies. It is in us that the mystery lies, why we choose not to live the way God's called us to. The mystery of living with sin and a God who loves us anyway. How can we reconcile this?

Anyone ever hate long drug commercials? I actually started timing them to see how much air time they are buying. The longest one I recently saw was a Lunesta piece: 2:41. Seriously, a commercial that lasts 2 minutes 41 seconds! How insane. It's total brainwashing. Subliminal is so 1940's.

Unimpressed with the IRS

I am not prone to political commentary, but, after getting my second notification from the IRS, I am deeply disappointed in how the Tax Stimulus was handled. Sure, I'm happy I get some money. It's much needed. But, as of 2007, the US population was 301,139,947. Of course, it's grown since then, but, working with those numbers, and the average US household size being 2.61, as of 2006, that averages out to about 115,379,290 households in the US. Assuming printing, mailing costs and overhead for the IRS to mail these notification, as a country we spent, between the two mailings, $115,379,290.04 to inform ourselves of something everyone already knew as a result of mass media. So, why did we spent $115 million dollars to do something that had already been done? That's just bad business and worse governing.

Divine nerves

Years ago I had read some oriental literature discussing an idea relating the cosmological and the quantum. "As above, so below", the saying goes. With this in mind a possible connection between urban growth patterns and nerve cell structures came to mind. Below are two images, a nerve bundle and a high level overview of a city.





Nerve tissue





Urban sprawl

Notice how the road patterns resemble the random directions of nerve tissue. Obviously, the analogy only goes so far. Urban sprawl is essentially a two dimensional pattern, even though geography allows some 3 dimensionality. Nerve tissue is a 3 dimensional form. Nonetheless, I began to wonder about this pattern, centralized, outwardly expanding natural patterns. In addition to the relationship between nerves and urban sprawl were trees, rivers, fractal patterns, glacial and ice movements. These all had the same kind of branching physical structures. In reality, these are more self-similar than the urban development-nerve pattern. That being said, this pattern repeats so much, I just found it fascinating and keep noticing how it keeps reappearing across a wide range of scales, from the cellular to the geographical.

So, with the pattern being noted, I began to wonder if, assuming the scale of space and time are similar, nervous tissue is microscopic and develops very quickly. Likewise, the urban sprawl patterns would grow over time very slowly in proportion to the massive scale of cities. In the two pictures shown above, a nerve bundle is about 100 micrometers. A city, such as New York, is roughly 100 kilometers across. So, the size relationship is 1 to 100000000000. So, if that is the case, the amount of time it takes for full urban development should be proportional to the length of time it takes for nerves to form. Still looking for that number.

Just some interesting observations...

"Everything is permissible"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible"—but not everything is constructive. -- Paul

When I was growing up my dad instilled in me a great sense of hope. Until a few years ago, an untested sense of hope. As I grew up I was not a very athletic kid, but, I loved activity. When I got into 8th grade I started running cross country at a new school just to do something I was terrible. Over the years I got better, even got a small scholarship to go to school in Tennessee. Throughout college I was obsessed with the sport and focused on it to the utter demise of my academic potential. I did manage to graduate, but, obsessed as a I was, merely saw graduation as the opportunity to train unhindered by school. This went on for a few years. In 2002, I was running 110 miles a week hoping I would make some Michael Jordan-like breakthrough, becoming something I had longed to be for years.

It never happened. I realized, in this pursuit, it was something that would take away from a more important decision in my life: marriage. I saw a choice, love my dreams or love my wife. There was only one choice: I chose to love my wife. Pursuing my dream would have been selfish and cost me the greatest person I have ever met. I got married that summer and came to realize, or rather, accept, that I was not as gifted as I hoped. Around that time my dad, in one of our conversations, said, "It's okay to pursue your dreams until you realize they are only dreams." For me, this was a major challenge. I had truly believed that anything was possible. In this case, if I ran enough, if I did the right things, if I was perfect in my execution, if I exerted enough will, I could become what I dreamed of being. I had completely believed, "anything is possible". Running was the grounds upon which I tested this belief and came up realizing it was not true. Or, at least, not the way I thought.

A few weeks ago while driving to work, I realized as I reflected on one of our pastor's sermons that is not quite true. Indeed, all things are permissible. It is in the Bible. However, just because, as Paul said, something is permissible, does not necessarily mean it is for the best. The sermon discussed a woman who had lost her sight. To get into the church, she had to have someone assist her.

He had taken this actual experience to illustrate a larger point. Paul wrote of the church as a body. When a person is acting in a role that is not what they are intended to perform, other members of the body have to compensate for this person not doing what they are intended to do. He remarked that it's amazing how one person being unable (or, I would add to extend this notion, unwilling) to do what they are supposed to requires two bodies. This type of scenario detracts from God's ability to demonstrate his love and power because people are using their gifts the wrong way and detracting from God's glory for their own pursuits.

With my running, I believe, and, after reflection, still see that I probably could achieve my goals of being a world class athlete. However, the amount of time, energy and effort required to accomplish this would be a horrible waste of time and a gross misplacement of focus. I would have to have inordinate resources, financial, social, mental and emotional, to pursue this. That's not something, as I now sense Paul was hinting at, I see making a lot of sense.

With God, all things indeed are permissible. But, I am now inclined to ask, "Is this beneficial?" "Does this help me love more?" "Does this choice promote me or others?" It is the age old question of putting yourself or others first. We were given free will. Using it for good, however, comes at a cost. I learned that making dreams come true makes for poor goodness.

While discussing giftedness with someone recently an argument I had never foreseen came up. The other person had detached themselves from a religious background and formed a very anti-religious sentiment throughout their life. In an effort to convince me of the virtue of this choice they said that not using their gifts, referring to mental abilities, would be not living up to God's potential. At the time I didn't see it, but, this is the exact kind of thing Paul was talking about in 1 Corinthians 13. He clearly says,

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

This particular person would have nothing. In fact, I look at their life and have deep pity, a certain sadness. The only focus for this person is their own giftedness. Sadly, they don't even realize the shallow "depth" of their point of view. Never do they ask, "What is the gift for?" Only, "how can I use it to the best of my abilities?" Wrong focus, wrong result.

In particular, "intellectuals" fall into the category of person who will resort to this argument that they have something and that something should be their focal point. In reality, love is the intended focus, and all gifts are meant to enhance our ability to love. Taking the focus off the gift, off the self, and looking at the results, at the love generated (or, as in this case, never developed), I think this type of false thinking can be uprooted.

A while back I came across some information regarding the Hebraic calendar. To scholars of Hebrew culture, the lunar calendar is nothing new. In fact, is it a basic method of measuring time. Indeed, the small light, as Moses described it in Genesis, has been a major demarcation factor since the beginning of time. Having come up in a Western culture, that is to say, as a member who has been influenced by the Greeks and Romans, the lunar calendar is as wrong as it could be. Yet, I find something interesting about that fact that, in a situation where a culture has 50/50 odds on picking the right method for calculating time, Western culture opted for the one opposite that of the Hebraic culture. Now, the fact that our culture, one renowned for being anti-Christian, would be at odds with such a simple choice is not surprising. What I find surprising, however, is the fact that people are ignorant of the history behind the solar calendar. In Greek culture, Helios was the sun god. The fact that the calendar, the solar calendar that is, focuses the entire Western culture on a sense of time and the passage of day to night that could stem from a form of sun worship just strikes me as quite ironic. Yet, to think of working on a lunar calendar, or, to put it another way, based on a heavenly body that is not the sun, seems wrong. That prejudice is undoubtedly the result of having grown up only knowing the sun and day as the center of our system for measuring time. I've posted before about the significance of Friday nights (the beginning of the Sabbath day in Judaism) as being the most raucous of the American culture. It lines up quite nicely with the fact that a demonic form of cosmology would pin even the most basic type of norm, "Friday night fun", against a practice and form of viewing time that honors the God of the Bible. I guess it just amazes me that I've never seen a church point this out or realize it and act on this. I've seen churches that pose the question, and implement the practice, of having church on Saturday, but, as far as days beginning at dusk, that I have yet to see. We would literally have to flip our notion of day and night around... Only God would want to turn our world upside down that much, but, quite rightly.

Random thoughts by Will

Two thoughts I had recently, my typical fare:

1) If you could meet yourself, today, the same age, same person, just another body, what would you talk about?

2) If angels are not physical beings, can you be in the same physical space as an angel or do the laws of physics apply to spiritual beings?

Liam has a habit of occasionally waking up and screaming like a caged beast if we try to put him back to bed. We are considering the possibility this might coincide with a heightened sensitivity to things spiritual seeing as tonight is a full moon. And, just for posterity, it's a green light night.

Lunar phases

Last week's lunar eclipse reminded me of something I used to consider often. I explred astrology partly because I wanted to see what, if any, basis is real and partly because I know for everything counterfeit their is something real God created which the enemy is trying to replicate. Anyhow, I noticed there was a lot of dream activity in our house. I had something like 6 dreams the night before the eclipse. But, on a more regular basis, where full lunar eclipses aren't happening, there are forces exerted by the lunar cycles we have overlooked in our "scientific" Westernized worldview.

The Hebraic world worked on the lunar cycles. It still does. Indeed, their calendar is lunar whereas ours is based on the solar calendar. That being true, I wonder why we, as Christians in our scientific worldview, don't ditch the science. God hasn't changed his mind about the way the universe ran since Jesus' day. Many modern day Christians have simply never been shown that the solar model of time is not the real first-century model Christ and the apostles used. I just wonder, what are we missing because we are not paying attention to this? What sort of signs are being ignored because we have the wrong focal point?

The basic issues are well-known. High and low tide are directly related to lunar movements. Dream cycles work in conjunction with lunar patterns, as do planting and harvesting patterns. What else have I just not noticed. Even though it is anecdotal, as far as I know, many hospitals see increased frequency of activity around full moons as well as, though there's no real standard for weirdness, an increase in the bizarre factor around those times as well. In other words, there are lots of obvious indicators the lunar cycle is something that is real and its effects are powerful, albeit a discounted element of the forces being exerted on people.

On another note, I know that the "planetary" influences in astrology are more about the "spirits" or the "energies" of the planets than about astronomical or physical influences. Nonetheless, I often wonder, speaking in terms of macrocosmic patterns and gravitational influences, what sort of patterns can be attributed to the constantly changing interactions of planets upon each other. Most people don't follow the astronomical positioning of different planetary cycles enough to try and track the different patterns that might reveal themselves. Again, I often wonder what we're missing as a result.

Certainly, our call as Christians is primarily theocentric, first and foremost, but, anthropocentric next. We are to focus on the Kingdom of God and upon people. Beyond that, Christians are not really directed to pay too much attention to these Old Testament types of realities. In spite of this, I suspect there are dimensions of the spiritual walk of Christians that could benefit from being more aware of the heavens above. Perhaps God will make it a bit more clear to me what these influences are supposed to be and how they matter in our everyday lives.

Ruminations on princess toothpaste

My girls have princess toothpaste to help them get used to using adult toothpaste. Since we are remodeling and I couldn't find ours anywhere I used the pink goop. While I was brushing my teeth and looking around I noticed three princesses (we have princesses everyone) on the toothpaste tube. Around them were all sorts of glimmers of light and sparkles. Seeing as the toothpaste was named "Bubble gum magic", it made me think of Page's most requested movie, Cindarella. Those sparkling likes and magic are everywhere. Now, this isn't a magic is evil and we should ban kids from seeing it type thread. Rather, I had the notion come to me that, while fantasy is a dimension kids in particular find more meaningful than adults, the spiritual experiences I have been having and reading more about, in particlar orbs, lights, heavenly hosts, etc, are things kids might inherently be drawn to because of increased sensitivity. Kids are typically far more spiritually aware than adults and it makes sense that kids would see this "magic"--translated into this prophetic Chrsitianese as orbs, lights, angels, etc.--as a part of every day life. In other words, kids relate to these movies moreso than anything else because it is how they really experience things. We often dismiss their fondness for these movies as youthful fantasy and regard it as nothing more. My "bubble gum magic" moment was the realization that this "magic" kids see is probably something real, something signficant and something not to be dismissed. I want to talk to the girls and see if I can ferret out some confirmation of this insight, but, I think He showed me something with why "princesses" are so enamored with their movies and all that is royal.