Divine appointments are all around us. I remember reading a long time ago that many eastern cultures often treat strangers as if they might be God. In Scripture, Hebrews 13:2, it says, "Be not forgetful of strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." Today, while getting gas after Kerri picked me up I stepped out of the van thinking, almost feeling, someone was going to come up and talk to me. I saw no one, but was not surprised when an older African American man came up asking if he could pump my gas or wash the winshield on the van. I tend to wait until people act to gauge where they're coming from, so, I didn't think anything specific about him because he seemed to be nothing other than a man trying to help and possibly make a few dollars if he could. Unlike other people in this scenario I heard him talking to all sorts of pople, only, he started talking about scriptural truths. Part of mind began to think, okay, even satan knows scripture, but, it wasn't really a pressing notion. Instead I talked to him. I felt compelled to ask him about a dream, but just talked to him. As I was getting ready to he said, "Anything you can give." I said, "I can give you prayer." To a little surprise he was very receptive. I prayed for this guy, in the middle of 6pm Friday gas station traffic as fully as I would pray in church. Then he prayed over me. It was a very interesting encounter.

I was reminded of some of my other odd encounters and wonder how many people find themselves in the quirky places I seem to stumble into...mostly at gas stations. There was one time I got into a theological discussion with a satanist at a gas station on New Year's eve in Florida. Another time I met a druid who proceeded to hit on me (he was a man by the way) and who definitely had something supernatural going on with him. He was very much reading mail...I could tell by how he was fashioning his conversation. Lots of interesting, weird experiences at gas stations come to think of it. These always remind me of how much I like to pray. Thank God for giving me a passion for prayer. I feel that my desires for outreach are growing and my fear of going to streets are diminishing thanks to encounters like this. Lord, let your power fall that I may lead people to you through your grace and mercy.

Pager the revelatory girl

Yesterday I had to run to work to restart some of the machines because of the bad weather that blew through the night before. About 30 seconds before I came home Page turned to Kerri and said, "Daddy's home." Kerri replied, "I didn't hear the garage door open." Page walked to the other side of the kitchen about which time the door started to open. Kerri said to Page, I guess you were right. We get humbled when we do this quite often. We have learned to trust a lot of Page's foreknowings. She has known, within 3 days of conception, every time Kerri has been pregnant. We often jokingly ask each other if we should ask Page about things before they happen. Of course, with things like this, we are only half joking and even that percentage is dropping with each new things like this she does. Lord, help us, as parents, encourage and foster this gift as you have called us to.

Several years ago I avowed to learn Hebrew. I have a slight penchant for languages, but when I tried the first time, wasn't truly dedicated in this pursuit and didn't it make it much further than the alphabet. At times I've had visions of interesting things in Hebrew, phrases or images. But, I still have yet to truly learn the language. On Friday, while listening to some of John Paul's Fireside Chats, he was asked a question regarding Hebrew. As he responded to the question I thought I might like to resume pursuit of the language itself.

During another Fireside Chat this week, John Paul mentioned the pattern of choice and character formation. I will have to find the exact pattern, but essentially, thought leads to choice which leads to action which leads to habit which leads to attitudes which leads to character. This pattern has given me a nice structure on which to begin analyzing my life and perform some soul searching so I can pursue a deepened degree of order in my life. It is really a response to a call I feel God has placed in my heart to clean up my act. Nonetheless, I was very, very pleased to stumble across a website regarding Hebrew thinking which had a subpage called "Clear Thinking". On this page it says:

Many of the problems we experience in our lives, both individually and corporately, result from a lack of clarity in our thinking about what is real, true, and essential. It is rare indeed to find a person who takes the time to think clearly about things. Too often our fast-paced, over-stimulated, jacked-up society simply acts like a pack of Pavlovian dogs responding to the bells and whistles of the postmodern “techno culture” rather than as rational agents created in the image and likeness of God.

It doesn’t have to be that way. We can break free of the hypnotic conformity that surrounds us if we are willing to acquire the skill of intelligently listening to the thoughts that are inside our heads - and inside the heads of others in our society. These thoughts, of course, evidence themselves as decisions, which lead to actions, which lead to character formation (inward) and cultural expression (outward).

This section of the site is devoted to the appreciation of clear thinking. With the aid of clear thinking and the impartation of wisdom from God, we can be better equipped to “rightly divide the word of truth” and thereby know the truth, which, as the Master has said, will set us free.

Though I am not necessarily aiming to reinforce my intellectual disposition, this is precisely my heart's desire and has been for a long time. I long to remove character flaws that reside in my mind. Learning to think clearly, that is, to have common sense and abide in truth as God reveals it to me, is a major goal of my life. Several years ago, and many times in between, I have begun a pursuit of logic in order to understand the laws of the mind that I may truly be armed for protection against others, myself and the enemy as well as to possess the skills needed, as Paul had, to disarm people in their foolishness and incorrect thinking. I guess my biggest set back is typically not staying alert enough and maintaining my awareness to enact what I have know. Lord, renew my heart and mind that I shall hear the moments of kairos when lies and self-deception may be unveiled, when false opinions can be crushed and grant me the mercy to speak truth in love that you may be glorified, honored and accepted as God's chosen.

As seems to be the consistent trend of late, God talked to me a lot during service this morning. Here are a few of the things he remarked upon:

1. A long time ago I began to have a deep-seated suspicion of Paul's teachings. They are so different from Jesus' and the Apostle's teachings that I feel like he is an alien influence of sorts. One of my favorite passages, but one I also discounted the most, was Paul's usage of temple language when discussing the human body (1 Cor. 6:19). Yet, today, though I had probably read it a dozen times, God highlighted the verse in John 2:21 where John writes, after Jesus' clearing of the Temple, "...The temple he had spoken of was his body." The only thing clearer than that would have been Christ himself using that language. Every time I try to discount Paul's teachings, something else comes up and leads me to think it's not really as I once saw it.


2. Probably the biggest point He made today revolved around a few attitudes and struggles I have been having of late. I wrote a few weeks back about frustration and have been quietly wrestling with a sense of meaninglessness with regards to my personal life and work. While fumbling through some passages I came to Romans 8:18. The first sentence caught my eye, but it was the word "frustration" that really jumped out at me. Reading through the entire post, I felt a very clear response to my pleadings with the Lord to help me understand what is going on in my life. The body of Romans 8:18-21 reads as follows:
   
   

   I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to us. The creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God.

   
   The creation referred to here is "ktisis". An excellent discussion of the term, as is it used by Paul in this passage, is discussed by Rich Deem is discussed here. In this passage, Deem outlines that the creation alluded to by Paul must be a rational, and therefore, human creation. Within the context of the passage, he also outlines that this creation can be concluded as being the Gentile body the gospel is aimed to reach.
   That being said, my own frustration ties more closely with the futility of an unredeemed mind. Were I to be submitting to Christ in all things, I would have a different attitude about the struggles in my life. They are not, as Paul writes, worth comparing to the glory that will be revealed to us." As I pray through this and God continues to give me mercy and revelation, He is showing and molding me to have a more Christ-like attitude and ultimately, a God-like character. Praise God for his revelation and loving kindness.
   Even more interesting than this, the passage that caught my attention, is that the editors of the bible I use titled the next section "More than Conquerers". Romans 8:37 pinpoints a stronger point. The inherent meaning of my name, William, is "conquerer" or "resolute defender" depending on the etymology; at times I see that as being very significant because I feel faced with great warfare that I feel God calls me to overcome...to conquer. But, putting this into the context of this recent bit of insight, I am inclined to hear that God is aiming to give me peace about the sense of meaninglessness and frustration I have in my life.
   Beyond this gift of understanding, I am to understand, and actively move forward with my choices and attitudes, being aware that, in as much as my namesake impels me to overcome and conquer, Paul's writings indicate that the innate drive commanded by my namesake stops short of God's call. In fact, we are called to realize, reflecting back on Paul's statement in verse 18, that he spoke of the incomparable glory to which our troubles might be compared , verse 35 recalls this point and reminds us that nothing shall separate us from his love. That glory is beyond the realm of conquering, a glory of inseparable love, which even our problems, not matter how great, cannot steal, kill or destroy. Conquerers overcome and cast down, but, their power is one of passing right. Christ's love, on the other hand, shall never be overcome. Once it is in us, it cannot be replaced. Nothing we face can compare to this. This is a deeply powerful truth and I pray God would help me to sear it into the depths of my being so I can live as one who is more than a conquerer.


3. 
   

Are the sinners in your life really sinful enough?

I wonder at times if I inject myself far enough into the world to draw God's power as fully as He wants to demonstrate it. My first answer is, sure, there are sinners everywhere, we're all sinners. But, my second glancing blow at the question sticks a little bit more. Jesus hung out with prostitutes (I don't do that), tax collections (I don't do that), sick and dying-if not dead-people (I don't do that), the outcast (I don't do that) and the generally all-around-unaccepted-and-unacceptable people in our society. So, how do I do that?

As a parent, I think, I don't want my kids exposed to things that could give them bad influences. But, then I am forced to think of the Apostles. Peter most likely had children. We know he was married because Jesus healed his mother-in-law. Mother-in-laws only come in one flavor, though marriage relationships. To imagine Peter having children is really not a far stretch at this point. So, I wonder, what did Peter think? Did he ever wonder if his kids were going to get a bad influence as he followed Jesus around healing leprosy, talking to Samaritan women and healing the dead?

In today's world, we are so afraid of these things that we isolate ourselves from those who need us most. I know as a parent, I don't want prostitutes in my house because they might do things that will make my children go ways that are potentially sinful. But, in reality, I think Christ would be saddened by this. This quietly presumes that God is not capable of protecting my kids. I guess part of it is the idea that I do not feel truly capable of protecting my kids and my wife from the things that might enter our lives when we open those doors.

Sometimes people who are on the edge of society are less concerned with obeying societies rules and tend to do more of what they want or need to do regardless of the consequences. That kind of abandon frightens me. What if a crack addict we try to heal doesn't accept Christ, breaks into my house and kills one of my kids? Or, what if one of the prostitutes we try to heal has AIDS and affects one of us? These are real questions, but certainly not things God can't take care of. I guess I confess my fear outweighs my faith at this point and pray that God will give me the courage to do the things he places in my spirit regardless of what my mind presents as valid reasons for not doing these things.

I think about the irony of 1 Corinthians. This book of the Bible is often one of the most cited, most "Christian" books in the entire New Testament. It talks about love, spiritual gifts and the Body of Christ. But, people forget that Paul was writing a congregation that had orgies, sexual sin, pride, incest and internal division and strife as some of the more obvious issues going on in their midst. Now, let me ask you, if your church was in this state, would you still be attending it? I know it was a different time and sexual practices were more tied to religion of that day, but, still, these people had some major sin issues.

At the heart of the fact is this: Paul was allowed to speak some of the most powerfully unpacked applications of Christ's life in this epistle because the sin was so great. Indeed, corporate education is needed to impact the ignorance and lack of faith demonstrated by these people because fundamental understandings and principles of Christ was truly grasped in this body. Minor issues are easily dealt with, but, the great power of Christ is most clearly displayed where the most deficient segments of relationship and understanding of God are. For me, to impact the way the Apostles impacted, I have to do something radical, something that goes to the root of the situation, and go where their is the most ignorance of Christ, both as the result of negligence and as the result of willful rejection. There Christ, as he did with the Corinthians, can do the most good. It is those who don't know that can be affected the most, because if you do know and simply don't do, you are responsible for your own lack of responsiveness to the call of Christ.

Salvation.

In all of my experience with Christianity, no other single word has been so misunderstood than salvation. I'm sure there are plenty of other concepts that just get the living spirit beaten out of them, robbed of meaning and stripped of their significance. But, from almost every encounter I've had with unchurched folks, salvation tends to be the most rejected of them all.

Alright, so, people get confused or don't care to understand salvation like I do. So what? I think it's more than a so what. It's a real, pertinent matter that affects quality of life, which is really just focused on the individual, and quality of society, which does extend beyond the individual but remains limited in its scope. Here are some reasons why.

• Salvation is about protection. This is far and away the most important truth. One of the fundamental questions in philosophy rests on this premise that one must decide whether they are the most powerful being in the universe or they are not and there is at least one or more more powerful beings in the universe. Now, most people would defer to the latter, but there are circles of thought which prove otherwise.
  
  If you think you are the most powerful being in the universe, I have to defer to God on that logic because only power can shake that deception and even in that case, deception may persist. On the other hand, someone who acknowledges a higher power at least leaves room for discussion. They acknowledge something greater than themselves. That is often a matter of identifying what they subscribe their fears and hopes to and working from there.
  
  In either case, salvation addresses the issue of protection. When Jesus offers salvation, he offers protection from God and our judgment for sins as well as the attack of the enemy in our daily lives. Many people who do not accept salvation basically reject the notion on the grounds that they don't need protection. They think:
  
  
  
  1. there is really nothing to be afraid of
  
  
  2. they can take care of themselves or
  
  
  3. nothing can be done about it anyway.
  
  
  
  
  In each of these cases there are specific responses that can deliberately and logically respond. But, I don't want to apply logic, I want to apply love. What is is about this person that they live in fear, the opposite of love, which prevents them from accepting there is something to fear. Is it because the illusion thre is nothing to fear less frightening than the reality itself? Or in the second case, is the idea of one being incapable of dealing with something too much to handle? Lastly, does resigning oneself to powerlessness justify it in their minds because they are a victim?
  
  There are a great many responses, lies in reality, people try to offer in defense of rejecting salvation, but, many of these are based on temporal perspectives. We all need protection. There are forces, visible and invisible, we have no control over. But, in accepting that God has control over them and He is willing to guard us, we are able to find safety from these powers. As clever as many of today's "secular" thinkers are, it's never very stylish to realize one day that you are in the middle of a field with no one around, completely vulnerable, waiting for attack. That's one of the most horrible feelings I can think of.



• Salvation is not lip-service. Salvation is a matter of actually living in such a way that one honors their beliefs. In another frame of reference, we have to line up with what God says about his ways in order for Him to protect us. In the gospels, Christ talks about people who know his name but who will not be accepted into the Kingdom. I don't want to be one of these people rejected for loving God with my lips and my lips alone. This means feeding the poor, being the last, willfully and joyfully praising God in all things, loving the unlovable, preaching the good news to the poor. Not a single one of these things is popular, easy or normal in today's world. We have to go out of our way to find Jesus in our lives, but, by going out of our way, we begin to get close to where the spirit is. He isn't in the middle of the TV most of the time. Why do you think sister Teresa was considered such a powerful force even though almost nothing she did made television.
  
  If it's public, it's often not something God is paying attention to. We need to help those in shame, in guilt, in pain, in lost, deceived places. How many people want those things to be exposed? How many people want to be ridiculed and rejected? Society frowns upon such things. It's the very nature of social life. People generally only meet to deals with needs and desires. Typically, common gatherings of needs and desires are exchanges between different groups. People in need, like the needs mentioned above, don't have anything to give, so, society, in the "social" sense, isn't interested in them. They require giving without expecting anything in return. Society, in its most basic tendency, aims to give in expecting a comparable or superior return to the thing given, whether it's time, energy, thought, entertainment, etc.
  
  Lip service is often the way of most society, the church being no exception. So, I have to ask myself, what do I have to do in order to really love? In my mind I think of things that require me getting in people's lives. Look at Jesus, he went to people's houses, ate with them, spent time with them, told stories, listened, shared. They built experiences together. Jesus was invasive. I want to be invasive with my love because most people will not show you their woundedness unless you make it known that you want to help. At best, I want to do as Christ called me to do in Matthew 28:18-20. And I can't make any disciples without first teaching what Christ did worthy of learning. The only way to teach what Christ did is to do it. The didactic of Christ is action. Lip-service is possibly the greatest deception in all of Christianity and I can no longer pretend that this hypocrisy in my life is justifiable. He will not protect us if we don't do as he did, because that is the earmark of someone who is not one of his brothers.

I got somewhat lost in this because I am in a transitional place where I am trying to really get grounded in my life and move to a place where I am doing God's work. Waiting for tomorrow and letting people live out the rest of their daily demise without speaking up for Christ is just cowardice. I so rarely feel the opportune moments, the kairos, but, truth be told, I so rarely put myself in a place to feel whether a door is ready to open or not that I'm not doing what I know in my heart and spirit needs to be done.

Lord, increase my faith and courage that I may love you as Christ loved you. Open and heal my fearful soul that it will glorify you by reaching to the lives of others without reservation but will transparently and wholly give to others what you have given to me. I know that giving creates a greater capacity to give, so, Lord, let me give what you need me to give. Whether its time, love, coats, words of knowledge, money or encouragement, let me know what your will is and move into a place of powerful humility. Praise be to Jesus Christ, Yahweh and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Last Tuesday Kerri and I had the distinct privilege of being able to make it to one of Barbie's TNT events. We were glad to see her first Dallas representation and heard and saw some great things. One thing that stuck out was a picture she had shown before, but, about which she showed us something new.

During a conference someone had taken photos trying to capture pictures of orbs. This one particular photo she had showed one. Yet, upon closer examination, and zooming in, it showed what appears to be the outline of a person in worship. Early this morning, around 3am, I woke up from a dream. After waking, I began thinking of this image and it occurred to me that perhaps the person in the orb was someone, not an angel, who was praying in the spirit. God translated their spirit to the conference for a moment, and then returned them back to their actual place and time.

I have had moments in prayer or worship where I would be somewhere else momentarily then back in my normal space-time location. These moments always eluded me as to their nature, but it seems that this instantaneous translation might be a key to understanding what's going on.

It makes sense. The Holy Spirit goes where faith is present. Faith is a substance (Hebrews 11) and worshipers worshiping in truth and spirit would possess faith. Faith is to the Holy Spirit as oxygen is to the human being: necessary and present in times of presence. In this sense, the Holy Spirit goes where their is faith. Likewise, in worship, the Holy Spirit may seek to provide people a glimpse, and a brief touch, of the events going on in a different place, a conference, a worship service, a sermon. In those moments, people could easily be translated from one place, to the Holy Spirit's gathering, then back to their proper place.

I strongly believe there is something along these lines that God showed me about how and why people show up in spirit at a place, then disappear. That would be a major way to explain orbs. People peeking into a space=time from another place.

Two interesting thoughts have come to mind of late: 1) the idea of order and authority and 2) consciousness and genius.

Order and Authority

Over the past 6 months I have had a driving desire to create order in my life. If you know me at all, order, or at least, organization, is not one of my hallmark traits. Well, that is changing, and, it's changing in a big way. When we moved into our current house we had stuff that had been in boxes since we moved to Dallas that, before that, had been in boxes from our house in Baton Rouge that, before that...well, you get the drift.

After having grown tired of not being able to find things and just getting fed up with clutter, I began to sort through paper, stuff folders, label, filter, file...you got, organize. In this process, and here's the heart of this post, I began to see how much easier certain aspects of life could be. Finding paperwork was not a struggle. Keeping things orderly was much easier. Yet, deeper than that, I realized that I found a growing awareness of control over the affairs of my life.

This awareness led me to connect the notion that we are only able to get promoted to the next level once we have mastered our current level. This sounds much less profound out of context than it is for me while I'm realizing it. Translating this to the spiritual arena, I am creating order in my life. Once I reach the level of order I am meant to have in my life, I will then be ready to move to the next level where I shall find new things that have to be ordered. Yet, in this process, I am learning the importance of order and maintaining order.

To me this is an awesome realization because I connect the idea of kosmos, as Gregory Vlastos discusses it, as being an active force. In Scripture, an amazing act of God was the creation and sustaining of order. Paul commends his audience in Colossians 2:5 saying, "I delight to see how orderly you are". In this sense, Paul is referring to the act of arranging in order. It is an act of establishment.

Perhaps that is the deep-seated joy I feel, a settling, a call to rest. Granted, order is not only something that must be established, but it must also be maintained regularly. Until this point in my life I only saw order as a moment in time, and, in a way, there is no continuous order. But now, I see order and an ongoing necessity, and this has helped to understand how believers must actively establish their authority over their lives. Unless this authority, this order, is constantly maintained our blessing becomes a curse. Without exercising the authority God calls of those he blesses, we can easily become overwhelmed by his provision and lose the right to continue growing in our calling.

I thank God for blessing, for the transfer of his wealth, but I thank God more so for the ability and wisdom to know how to receive and possess the blessing he pours out. Without improvements to my character, to my soul, I could never truly receive what he has called me to do because I would not be demonstrating his active/act of order. We are called to grow in our understanding of God and, in this case, I believe the only way I could fully appreciate God's mystery of order was to learn it firsthand.

Consciousness and Genius

I often marvel at people like Mozart who could hear a symphony and identify the most minute of misplayed notes amongst a sea of music without err or effort. People like Shakespeare whose rhapsodic use of language is unlike any others that has come since in the English language...or Van Gogh, whose art transcends the boundaries of two dimensions, colors and a canvas. These creators, these innovators have always possessed an air of otherworldliness, superhuman powers and amazing abilities for me.

That people such as these exist and do remarkable, often incomprehensible, things is hardly groundbreaking. But, understanding what it is like to be them, to glimpse through their minds for just a moment, that would be profound, life-altering and magnificent. One aspect of the works and lives of these men is captured in the abnormal degree of presence they possess in their works. They can command and communicate through their works such a high degree of depth and reality that it simply escapes the reach of comparison when we try to hold other, similar works next to them.

How do they do it? Remember entire scores for symphonies, or, like Joyce spouting Shakespeare to a copy to avoid getting a ticket, recall entire chapters of writing without effort...how do they do that? Part of it is engrossment and the degree of awareness these men possess. You cannot create or express such detail in work unless you know it is there. To be aware of the depth and magnitude of detail these works often embody is not normal. Indeed, that is a major key in knowing how to grasp what these men and women are doing. They see more than others so they can say and show more than others. That major realization helped me to get a grip on what lies at the heart of seeing like a genius.

But, what in the world does awareness have to do with genius? Unless I can begin to cultivate an increasing degree of awareness I will never grow closer to understanding how the greatest of great minds grasp things. Yet, in all this I have to constantly know, some people can simply do things others will never be able to. I can never play basketball like Michael Jordan or speak 24 languages like Marx's mentor. I can, however, grow in these areas...and knowing that greater awareness makes for greater realization is one of the most important things I can understand in that process.

Ordinary people can do this...at least they can grow in their awareness. For example, take people who are caught in life-threatening situations, a robbery, or, life-changing situations, a wedding. Often times people remember every detail of these events. Colors are brighter, smells become permanently planted in the brain, certain phrases spoken in these moments can be perfectly recalled years later. This altered state of consciousness is nothing new, but it is something most people do not tap into on a regular basis. That is what training is for.

Children can often tap into these trancelike states easily. Baby Einstein movies, Disney movies, certain music, sights and sounds enrapture children and completely absorb them. These things embrace their young minds and brains. Likewise, we too can becomes completely absorbed in experiences, but we have to regress to a place where we can move into that impressionable state. Geniuses, returning to the point at hand, often access this realm more easily because their abilities afford them the luxury of not having to contend with day-to-day life.

In fact, being abnormal in this respect often cultivates the ability to live on the cusp of all-consuming consciousness and ordinary consciousness. Since many geniuses are prodigious and have their way of life embraced early on, the membranes of consciousness typically reserved for childhood are not strengthened as they are in others and their youthful ability to vacillate between creativity and normalcy remains strong as long as they continue to develop and use their abilities.

Since the impediments of normal development are often pardoned as being unnecessary for these children they are given sort of a free reign in this arena. With the rest of us, however, we have to unlearn ourselves. We have to push, prod and stretch the parts of ourselves that have become rigid, calloused, inflexible. Sometimes these are ideas or beliefs, such as, "I can't possibly ever understand art like Picasso." At other times, we have to force ourselves into new areas, like finding that thing which totally engrosses us. It may not be easy, and will take us through many things, but, when we do find it, will speak to us like nothing else has, like a voice heard long ago, whispering, "I'm glad to see you, welcome home." We can all grow to where we were and, in the process, open the door to where we're supposed to go.

I am firmly convinced that every single person has a unique purpose for being alive. That is part of God's plan. It requires us to realize we need others at all times, but to also realize others need us as well. With this balance in mind, I see that unique purpose, that genius of the individual, as being a source of great power. We can see that we have some unique and special thing to offer the world. We, in a way, are geniuses of ourselves. As such, we have an awareness, a giftedness that no one else can possibly have. That is what we have to contribute to the world in a way no Mozart or Einstein could ever match. Our calling is the power of our genius.

The most challenging obstacle is to not get caught up in the trap of comparing our calling with other's calling. Paul talks about this in 1 Corinthians 12. We are each called for a special purpose and trying to be something we are not called to be not only prevents us from achieving God's will for us, it also prevents others from achieving their destiny because you're out there trying to their job and not doing your own. So, being aware of your call allows God's kingdom to grow even faster because we are working with others in way that not only allows other's strengths to shine, but, in the process, allows ours to grow with theirs in a way nothing else can come close to matching.

At the new year I began one of my mid-term goals: pursuit of MCSD certification. I managed to get about 15 books for .NET 2.0 because it's being ousted by the 3.0 package and Vista. Nonetheless, I need to get my C# skills down before I worry about the new implementations offered by 3.0. At any rate, I wrapped up my first 3 month series of readings from John Sharp's C# 2005 Step by Step. I learned a great deal and am somewhat capable now I can write small, desktop apps with some basic functionality. Enough to develop light tools for helping at work with analysis of different files. Overall, I am happy to have finished stage one. Only 11 more to go and then I think I'll be ready to give the MSCD tests a shot. Right now I'm working on Developing Windows-Based Applications with Microsft Visual C#.NET. Seemed like a natural progression. I don't know enough about ASP.NET to move into web-based apps and I certainly am missing details for dealing with .xml-web-based applications beyond that. With that in mind, I still believe that after that, I want to try and shoot for the MCPD. But, first, I've got to be able to crawl!

On another area of interest, I've been thinking about something that, at least in my gut, bothers me about what it might imply, but, trusting God, will explore anyway. Last week it occurred to me, after listening to a talk in which C. S. Lewis' concept of the four loves was mentioned, it popped into my head that love, as a notion, ties much more closely with the body than we often think. I specifically started thinking about love and emotions. When people "feel" love, they don't feel love in their toe. They often feel it in their chest or heart region. And thoughts. When we refer to thoughts, again, we don't refer to our toes when identifying where thoughts occur.

Where I'm going with this is that many of the soul activities we refer to have correlations with specific regions of the body. Now, one thought is that we might be feeling partial expressions of the true emotion. For instance, love, in its full form, might be felt throughout the entire body. Mystics talk about the mind encompassing their entire being, knowing everything in their body. These larger than life experiences are probably more akin to the types of full-life use of the soul we were meant to have. However, most people live fractions of what they are capable of, and this explains why only regions of the body can be isolated manifestations of these soul experiences. I just find it curious as to why we feel certain emotions in certain regions and only certain regions.